Chapter 29 of my book In His Hands is called Guilt Trip. In it, I wrote about the guilt I felt when I survived my cancer and others didn’t. “Survivor guilt,” I wrote, “is the feeling that you’ve done something wrong by surviving a traumatic event that others haven’t — an earthquake, a lay-off, a war. It’s also a common side effect of cancer.” I described going to the wake of a dear man who had lost his battle with cancer. “For the moment, I wasn’t afraid of my cancer anymore. I was afraid that a mistake had been made, that the wrong person was in the casket.”

“Some people survive a cancer diagnosis and go on to do incredible things to make the world better. Others simply survive and go on, which to those around them is an incredible thing that makes the world better. And then, there are those who don’t survive.

“I’m probably getting the quote wrong, but sometimes my Christian walk reminds me of the poem about that famous military charge: ‘Theirs not to wonder why. Theirs not to make reply. Theirs but to do and die.’ We just have to keep marching, even when our orders don’t make sense. The comfort? Our orders aren’t based on vanity or false information. Our orders come from the One Who created the world, and Who loved us all enough to let His Son die to bring us safely home.”

A dear friend and family member lost a sudden and brief fight with cancer this past November. His immediate family is still learning how to live with the gaping hole in their lives. Another dear friend’s father is currently fighting the battle.

Whatever your pains, whatever your struggles, whatever your guilts, I pray that it turns you toward the One Who can bring peace in the storm. In our crazy, spinning world that can turn upside down with a single phone call, please know that you are loved more deeply than you can ever imagine and that this, too, shall pass.